Blog reincarnation! How did I came back from the mental and poker downswing

Jeez, it's been a long time!

Over a year and a half I've been going up and down with my poker game. I'll try to remember the most important thing which occurred during that time.
Let's see.
After big mindset problems after I came back from Cyprus back in September 2013, I was trying so hard to get myself back. I tried with a pause - didn't help a lot, I tried with more play time - didn't help at all. The only bright thing happened close afterwards was winning a satellite for Danube Poker Masters Main event and Highroller event held on October '13, but it didn't go well either. After months of thoughts what I should do, I finally decided. Locking down cash game was truly a bliss for myself and my bankroll. I totally switched to tournaments (not really much of a choice at PlanetWin365 room, but still fine). It was like end of the January 2014. Somehow, things started to go really good when I was close to busto. I got a call from a friend asking me if I would like to go to Malta for Planetwin365 100k GTD tournament, which wasn't really hard to accept since I got whole package including hotel expenses and a buy-in. I was really happy to go there because earlier I was going nuts since my downswing / mental game problems, and hoped to eventually score something big there. It was a really nice trip, but poker game didn't go well. I busted out from every tournament played there, + it went all wrong at the cash game. That was the time I finally didn't touch cash game until I improve my mental game.

Here are some pictures from that trip:

Outdoor pool at Hilton hotel - Dragonara Casino far away

Portomaso Port, look from the terrace

Nice weather for an outdoor morning coffee :)

Practically, we only had one night out, and since it was off-season it was so-so. 

A trip to Malta was 6 days long, from 28th February to 6th March. Even tho things didn't go really well, I was still happy to have been there and hopefully get my batteries recharged.

After Malta, I concluded for sure that from that time on I would play only tournaments. So I started grinding it. I also added some single table sit'n'gos, but it turned out that it was just a waste of time and nerves. Here's the graph from the beginning of my tournament grinding:

First 1000 games were mostly SNGs

After a month of MTT grinding, a friend of mine called me out for a live tournament in Zagreb, Croatia. I wasn't quite sure at the beginning because I felt like I wasn't ready enough to start again, but 2 days before the tournament in Zagreb, I won online about the same sum I'd need to go there and pay buy-in and travel expenses so I agreed to go there. Fortunate enough to have real life friend there I even didn't need a hotel since my friend called me to sleep over at his flat. It was truly a nice offer, and I was happy to stay there and meet him & his girlfriend again. It was a 3-day event (Day 1a, day 1b, day 2 and day 3 for a final table). 

So I called for a minibus going from Belgrade to Zagreb twice a day and it matched perfectly. 

The journey began on 6th of April, so the day tournament was starting. I didn't know if that was really good idea since I'd have no time to rest, but whatever, we'll see. My hosts were waiting for me and I arrived at 2 PM, but the tournament was starting at 3 PM. I spent some time with them, and then went to casino. 

The tournament went pretty well and smooth. I was grinding up to build my stack enough to finish day 1 as a chip leader and it already felt big in that time. I was in big online upswing and now this... Couldn't really be happier about my recent results at that time and I knew that my mental game was growing bigger and bigger from day to day. 

Since there was day 1b, I used the free time to meet Zagreb and its' culture. My host and I went to see most of the big cultural and religious buildings, as well as to enjoy the beautiful Cvjetni Trg (Flowers' Square) and Trg Bana Jelacica (Ban Jelacic's Square). I really had a nice day with him, and I'm thankful for the time spent with me there.

Ivo and myself in front of the Drazen Petrovic's hall

I went to bed earlier that day so I could play and think well tomorrow. 

Day 2 was also starting at 3PM, so I woke up, had a cup of coffee then continued to the casino. I went in, met new players at the table and started to build my way to the, hopefully, final table. As far as I remember, the day didn't start really well. I was losing my chips so badly, lost few flips, but when it came to tournament survival, either I was getting lucky (I can remember a AQ vs AK hand versus a friend of mine now, where the dealer dealt straight or 2 pairs on the board) or my hand didn't get sucked out. Slowly but steady, we were in the money, and after we got in, I was playing way better than earlier that day. At last, we were there! Final table of Balkan Texas Poker Tour. I was really hyped and excited to play my second live poker final table! After ft bubble popped, I went to the flat excited and hoped to do a miracle next day since I was starting it with 20BBs or something, starting the final table on 7th/9 place chipwise. Another big thing about the final table is that I would play against ex-Party Poker Pro, Dragan Galic. 

I got some rest that night and we were there. Final table included few youngsters, few mid-aged players and some older players. Turned out that the youngsters had a big edge since we were down to 3 players, with 3 of us under 30 (out of the 3 starting the final table, 2 were short stacks at the start of the final table). There were big plays out of everyone of us, but eventually they flipped for the heads-up duel with me. So I was there. Heads-up meant so much to me, but what I really wanted is WIN. I thought it should be easy since I was 3:1 chip leader. And not to be underestimated, my opponent was one of the best Croatian's heads-up players. But it was just going smoothly, I was making bigger and bigger advantage, and we came to an all-in point with him holding AK and myself holding QQ. The board came 10-high and it was it!!! I was the champion of the tournament! I never felt better in my life, felt like living a dream :)

Balkan Texas Poker Tour Trophy in my hands!

After it, I went for some tequila shots with friends of mine from Balkan PokerNews site, and had to get back.

I was really surprised that even my hosts knew I won it! They were following it too, and I really felt happy and supported like never before. Calls, messages, a lot of those were incoming and by lot I mean really really lot. I felt that the tournament win didn't mean something big only to me, but also to my closest friends and family. And I'm really thankful to all of them for the support given.

Balkan Texas Poker Tour Trophy

Sadly, next day I had to leave. I went out for a dinner with old friend of mine, back from Warcraft 3 days, discussed some about lot of things, went back flat, packed, and it was already time to leave. I was feeling really tired that day, but what was waiting for me after I came back to my flat in Belgrade was splendid! My closest friends made a welcome-home surprise party, we partied all night long, everyone got wasted as f*cks and it was finally a time to sleep. 

It was the happiest and the most meaningful trip I've had so far by that time, and once again I thank all those who supported me.

Since there is a lot more to write, I'll have to finish this post, and continue some next day :)

Thanks everyone for the read, I hope you had a good one.